GOTTA keep moving!

OK, so my husband has been home sick all weekend and stayed home Monday and Tuesday from work. That basically meant that he had commandeered our computer and that I was unable to complete my video project. I have also been struggling to get up the courage, or "the will" you could say, to work out again. Sometimes I will have a great workout and afterwards find myself thinking- "OK, I did really well, so that should last me the next 2 months a least, right?". WRONG. LOL!

At least ONE thing has been going well. Baby is finally getting her bedtime routine together. Bath time at 8:30pm, bedtime at 9pm- AND she is actually doing it! Sometimes it takes a little longer for her to go to sleep and actually STAY asleep, but a lot of the crying is over. The only thing now is that she sleeps for about an hour and then wakes up again. She'll go back to sleep if I fed her, I just have to be careful that I don't fall asleep with her, otherwise she ends up sleeping with me all night! OK, so I'll admit it, there seem to be a few loose ends yet to be worked out- but we're getting there. :)

One great thing I have been accomplishing more and more, little by little lately is the practice of my harp. I am not an accomplished player, but I want to be better and I can play simple things and beginning piano pieces on my harp. I want to brush up on my guitar though, too, so that Baby and I can sing song together one day- Baby plus siblings yet to come :)

At the same time I have to remember to PRIORITIZE and make sure that GERMAN study is number one (after Baby, of course)...even though I would much rather do other things. At times, I feel like a person with split personalities. One side is the little girl that would rather play all day and pretend that German didn't exist (because, you know of course that if you ignore a problem that it goes away...NOT...if only it were THAT easy), and the other part is a concerned mother that goads and scolds the child into doing what is in it's best interest (I hate that responsible side sometimes- LOL!). So, alas- I must bend to responsibility and press on as the ever motivated, or RE-motivated mother. I can't lose my DRIVE. :)

One small step for most, One sore step for me!

Well...I finally got up the nerve to workout yesterday. I ended up doing an hour of Dance Revolution. Laugh and make fun of me if you must, but try tellin' my sore thighs that it wasn't a workout! I had it on workout mode doing a program I call dance till you drop. OH MY GOODNESS, I was a stompin' maniac. I am actually getting pretty good, but that program goes through about 6 songs non-stop, 6 challenging and fast songs. That will burn about 47 (give or take) kcal. per round. BUT, my goal is 200 kcal. each session. Let's just say, I was afraid that I was going to puke at one point...sad isn't it :)

I did a stair step approach. I went through like this: easy, hard, difficult, and then easy for a cool down. WOW, I think that I will either be skinny in no time, or I will just have monster bulging thighs- not sure which yet, only time will tell.

Is it too soon for a HOORAY?

Well, it might be too soon for Hooray, but I can almost taste the victory. Last night I gave baby a bath before bed and went through our whole new bed routine and things were going really well. Bath time at 8:30pm, bed time 9pm...that's when the fun started. 9pm to 11pm was all about, "please stop crying and go to sleep".

HOWEVER, from 11pm to 1am she was sleeping soundly, and she even rolled herself onto her stomach- a first for her in bed. But, unfortunately, baby was not to blame when it came to getting back in bed with mom and dad...by the time 1am rolled around I was SOOOO tired that I caved and brought her into the bed so I could sleep. AAAAHHHHH!

It seems that this whole baby sleeping in her own bed thingy is going to require more strength of will on my part than originally thought. I have to re-train us both- LOL!

As far as my goals are coming, I have 30min. more of German to do today, need to read to the baby, read scriptures, go on a walk outside, DO LAUNDRY, and think of something nice for dinner (my husband really likes that goal- go figure!). I am shooting to publish me first German video on Monday.

L-O-N-G nights

First, I realized yesterday that I over estimated the time needed to create a decent German instruction video for youtube. I have been thinking and decided that posting one once a week would be better and more manageable, which is what this is all about, right? Trying to accomplish goals, not just to make goals, that's the point.

NOW, about last night-
WOW, getting our little girl to bed has become a REAL challenge! I will admit that PART of the problem has been jet lag. We got back last week from visiting my family in the states, so I can understand that there would be some sleep issues. But oh my goodness, it's been over a week since we got back!

As a new mother I have been diligently striving to climb the proverbial mountain and come into my own zen like state of momness. You know, it's that point at which you know everything, you always know best, and eyes grow in the back of you head. Of course, it unfortunately is a path fraught with perilous undertakings and, yes, mistakes as one learns and grows. Some days I feel like Baby and I are gaining understanding at about the same rate, then there are other days that I feel just plain dumb- lol!

Since Baby was born we have been doing the whole "Co-Sleeping" thing. I really think that whoever thought that up was a crazy person that must have ended up like our midwifes' sister-in-law who's 19yr old son STILL sleeps with her and her husband. I on the other hand will never, NEVER, do that again with my other children yet to come. I now have a four month old that only goes down for the night if she is next to mommy and allowed to suck while she falls asleep (YES, I know, another cardinal sin).

So now my husband and I are paying the price of first time parenthood and praying every night that she will PLEASE decide that tonight is the night she will sleep on her own.

We are trying to get her into a better bedtime routine, which includes a bath every night and a story before bed, as well as lavender lotion for extra soothing power :)

I was so desperate to get her into sleep mode that I even gave her a bath at 11:30pm last night. It did help, but not enough to solve the problem. So I did some research and decided that we need to get out of the house more during the day as well so that she really sees the transition from day to night more clearly. It is just sooo cold right now!! There is snow everywhere, and I hate being out much this time of year.

So that brings me to where I stand now, forced more and more into a daily schedule and routine- the only funny part is that I enjoy having an organized day, I just lack the ability to always follow through.

BUT, as a new and DRIVEN mom it is my duty to give myself a big KICK in the posterior and move along.

You can't get better at ANYTHING if you don't try to be better at SOMETHING...so one thing at a time- "baby steps" you could say :)

Goals...Step 1- a life experiment

I think that the key to success is to truly understand oneself and be honest about your individual capabilities. That doesn't mean that you have to go and blab to everyone else about your shortcomings or insecurities though- thank goodness! They can still go around thinking that you're pretty much perfect, because if you really understand what it takes for you to achieve your goals and be successful then all that everyone else on the outside will see will be you reaching your goals. HA-HA!

For me, my problem is that I dream big and can be VERY over zealous and try to accomplish 20 new goals at a time. The reality of it is, though, that I really need to master each new habit and behavior one at a time in order to truly change patterns and reach new heights.

Doing the Doggie Paddle in the Bear State

So here I am in Berlin, Germany, the bear state, and I find myself a lone Texan. My husband and I moved here to spend more time with his parents, especially since he is an only child and all. I, however, am one of three.

The real ringer is that when we moved here, I was seven months pregnant. Did I mention that I don't speak German? So now I am the new mom of a beautiful baby girl, trying to figure out all the momness that all new moms have to learn while at the same time frightened to go out into the world of sausages, sauerkraut, and chocolate alone because, OH YEAH, I don't speak German...at least not in complete sentences- which poses somewhat of a problem.

Before we moved I was always busy. I was either in school, finishing my degree, or starting my career as a teacher. Don't get me wrong, being a stay at home mom has always been a dream of mine, but it DEFINITELY takes some adjusting. It is a different life and routine. I wouldn't trade it for anything though, I love the fact that I am able to watch my daughter grow and develop each day. The real issue is what to DO with myself besides just taking care of my infant. I want to feel productive in other ways too. I want to nurture and develop my talents further. AND, I of course NEED to learn German!

I feel that most days I have barely been keeping my head above water. But, with the new year, this is as good a time as any to get my act together and achieve better balance and fulfillment in my life. I need to stay charged and fulfilled spiritually and emotionally so that I will be able to better give and share with my family, you can't give if your cup is empty and you can't give much if it's only half full. I choose to have a full cup, a cup that runneth over- so to speak.

They say that necessity is the mother of invention. I think that necessity is also the mother of sink or swim. So, for now, I find myself doing the doggie paddle in the bear state.